These 7 Tips Will Keep You Cool This Holiday Season

Ever wonder why the holiday season, that's meant to celebrate a time of peace, can be such a gong show? Did you wake up December 1st and cringe? Are you procrastinating to go out holiday shopping till the final hour? Do you ask yourself all kinds of questions about meaning and tradition and why it just seems to be buried over by mall riots and Nat King Cole at hypnotic repetition? "It's not the getting, it's the giving," is the adage, but we all know that's not the case--

Here are some tips for keeping yourself cool during the holiday season, and possibly finding joy in it once again:

1. It's not a race: This is a maxim I've used in other posts about highway driving, and it certainly applies to holiday shopping. The Christmas rush is an illusion that is given the appearance of being real by savvy marketers and advertisers. There's no rush. Take your time; enjoy each moment.

2. Keep it simple: So many movies and magazines try to portray the "perfect holiday" feast--again, an illusion. There's no such thing on earth as perfection. The key is hospitality, which can come in the form of a simple meal and being present for your guests. Don't try to be someone you're not. Bring yourself to your hospitality, and not Martha Stewart--unless that's what you love.

3. Keep a light wish list: If you believe it's more about giving than getting, then keep the list light, and focus more on those around you, both family and those who have real needs. Instead of asking for something, have people donate money for your gift to a charity of your choice. Buying can be easy, but being present for another person is hard. A gift can be giving someone a lift somewhere, or helping someone who's having a hard time putting up their lights.

4. Give: Many of us have so much already. We live in one of the wealthiest countries in the world, and yet we have high rates of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. It's because stuff doesn't make us happy, but giving of ourselves can. Give your time to people in need: volunteer at a soup-kitchen or Meals on Wheels. In spite of our wealthy country, there is a growing divide between those who have and those who don't. So many people are in need.

5. Turn off the media: It's a great time to do a media-fast--that's right, taking some time to stay away from the TV and the Twitter. So much pressure comes from our consumption of media; and we know that media works in the interests of those companies that pay them in return for exposure. In any other circumstance, we'd call this a conflict of interest; but in show-biz, it's called 'entertainment'. Turn it off--it's not worthy of you.

6. Make amends: This can be a good time to make amends with loved ones and friends--another thing that gets missed amidst the tinsel and ribbon. If there's an unreconciled separation or conflict, and communication with that individual will not cause you harm, it might be a good time to reach out to them in a spirit of forgiveness.

7. Be in the moment: We often live in the past or the future, but rarely in the present moment. While you're in the busy-ness of the holiday season, take a moment to pause, breathe deeply, and relish the moment, of being alive, of being among others. Find something you can be thankful for and remind yourself of it. As Dylan sings, "Yesterday's just a memory, tomorrow's never what it's supposed to be..." We are alive now.

Try these out. And if you think of others, add them to your thoughts or a journal you might be keeping. This can be a time of joy--if we're open to its possibilities...