10 Reasons Why You Need To Stay Out Of The Fast Lane

Oh no you didn't! Driving slow in the fast lane? Really? Just sitting there while all those cars are backing up behind you flickering their high-beams and getting irritated as all get out?!

Here are ten reasons why you need to stay out of the fast lane:

1. You drive too slow, but you don't know it. One of the main issues with people driving too slow is that they actually don't know they're driving that poorly, and often are over-confident in their driving skills. Also a lack of real-time feedback (though I don't know how much obvious honking horns and flashing high-beams can be) is a reason why people seem to just not get it.

2. You're not willing to drive the speed of left-lane traffic: If you're uncomfortable with going over 120 kilometres per hour, then it's best to stay out of the left-hand lane, in which the average speed is more like 130-140. If you can't take the heat, stay out of the lane.

3. You're more interested in your iPhone 6 than the cars ahead of you. If you really--just really really really (ya right!)--have to text, then swerving back and forth from left to middle lane is very dangerous. Traffic in the fast lane is dynamic: a lot of stop and go and people cutting in and out. Pull over and text.

4. You're with your family on a 'comfortable drive'. The left lane is for those who really need to get somewhere; but of course that 'need' is a relative one. Do you really have to gun it at 140 kilometres per hour to get to your in-laws' house? Why would you make your family members nervous or uncomfortable or in any way put them at risk? 

5. You're too cocky for your, or anyone else's, good. Pride comes before a fall. How many people do you see in the left-hand lane who make you cringe because they're driving a half-inch from the bumper ahead of them, only to slip into the middle and one-inch from the semi-truck ahead of them, only to hardly pass the left-hand lane vehicle and slip back in half an inch from the vehicle ahead. You're going to kill somebody one day--if not yourself, then somebody else.

6. You're driving a semi-truck. No we don't want to see your swerving and nearly-tipping backside in the lane while you're cranking it up to 130 to pass the semi-truck that was ahead of you. And we don't want to be stuck behind a two-lane steel wall established across the left and middle lanes. Truck really should be relegated to the right hand lane, and banned from the fast lane.

7. You're intoxicated. You shouldn't even be driving--forget the fast lane...

8. You drive an exotic sports car. I feel for you, even though you make me feel nothing but envy: I can't imagine how frustrating it must be keeping your car between first and second gears unable to really let it perform as it was designed to and for which you paid all that cash. Either take it back to Europe where it belongs, or find yourself a speed track. Frankly--it's too painful to watch, like a stallion used as a mule horse. 

9. You have a heavy brake foot. Unless it's an emergency, braking hard on the highway, or even slightly, freaks people out--let alone those cruising at 130 kilometres an hour in the left lane. If you're in the left lane and have the wiggles with that brake peddle, get into the middle or even right hand lane. Those who drive well in the left lane are looking way ahead, and all that braking causes alarm, not to mention a chain reaction that can cause an accident further back.

10. You're in a new city. If you've got your GPS drumming out the next instruction for getting from A to B, it's probably wise not to whip it up the left lane: your cut-off could come up any minute, or, being unfamiliar with flow of traffic, patterns at certain off-ramps, or even driver friendliness for letting people into their lane (in Calgary, for example, people will let you cut in last minute--try that in Toronto!). Take it easy, travel alone the right lane, and, when need be (e.g. getting out of the way of slow-pokes) take the middle lane.